Suicide

It's cowardice. 
Forfeiting a match before you even know the outcome.
It is the low way around.
The coward's path, the shortcut.

But no one can deny that it takes a ton of courage,
to swallow those pills,
to light that match,
to take the final leap,
to squeeze the trigger...
A hell more of courage than I have.

Flying

Wind blowing,

Whistling in my ears,

As it tousles my hair.

Feet leave the ground

Soaring higher,

And lower.

Adrenaline coursing through my veins.

Eyes shut,

but still seeing everything.

I should be afraid,

But I am alive,

Free.

Never stop…


Brakes,

The roller coaster

Sliding into an abrupt halt.

I stepped off.

Trembling.

I had flown.


-By Lavanya Gupta

Lost

The warm sand tickled the soles of my feet. In the distance, I could hear gulls cawing. I ran over the scorching warm sand towards the azure sea.

The gentle waves lashing towards me had been luring me towards them; I had to give in to the siren’s call…

I waded through the knee-deep water and went deeper. 

Deeper, that I was standing on my short toes to reach the surface. Deeper that I was the only one standing that far. Deeper, that I alone…

Far away from everyone- friends and family. Far away from the call of chores and duties. Far away from mistrust, from betrayal, from sorrow.

Yes, the salt stung my eyes; but at least no tears were stinging them… Isolation? No, it was peace. Loneliness? No, it was a quiet bubble for me, and me only…

Water drops between my long eyelashes reflected the sunlight so all I could see were rainbows.

It was like someone had frozen time.

It felt like me, in my little sphere would remain suspended there forever.

No company, no words, no thoughts. It was just me and the mighty explored, untracked sea.

Ironically, I wasn’t scared facing that prospect.

It was one of my most welcoming thoughts in days…


-By Lavanya Gupta

Aren’t we all shadows?

Shadows

Aren’t we all shadows?

Shadows –

hazy images of a person;

a person you want to be.

Aren’t we all replicas of the ‘cool kids’,

the queens, jocks and cheerleaders?

Aren’t we shadows of them?

We were ourselves,

as children

when we were confident

and proud to be who were;

unique,rare and special…


Today we stand as nothing more than shadows.



-By Lavanya Gupta

Goodbye

Goodbye…

You can never leave after you say goodbye.


I’m still standing here,

in the inky gloom,

holding onto your last words.

Tiny pinpricks of light-

stars you had called them,

light up the dark of the sky;

but no one can light up the darkness in my heart.


Goodbye…

Isn’t this the last farewell;

aren’t you supposed to pull yourself together-

move on.

How can you grow new wings so easily,

when yours are broken,

shattered.

How can you forget me so easily,

leave me here alone,

to swallow the bitter truth?


Goodbye…

As I watch you fade into the horizon,

I know I’ll never be able to leave.

You’ll always find me here,

Awestruck,

holding onto the shreds of your last goodbye…


-By Lavanya Gupta

Bulletproof

Stone hard, machine gun,

Fire at the ones who run,

Stone hard as bulletproof glass

– Sia, Titanium

She never falters.

Confident.

Flawless.

The epitome of perfection.

She is a star,

in the night sky;

a rare gift.

She stands a little taller;

her smile- brighter than the rest.

You could try to shoot her down,

but bullets of heart just ricocheted off her armour.

she is bulletproof…


But there are two faces to every coin,

and two sides to every story.

As she sits in a deserted alcove,

her impenetrable armour disintegrates into nothing.

She lays still,

in an inky corner,

rivulets of mascara flowing down her cheeks…

That mask was nothing more than a pretence,

a feeble attempt at masking her scars,

making herself whole once more;

you see that bulletproof heart was actually a fallen soldier…


-By Lavanya Gupta

War

What war means to me


War is nothing more than a stray word,

a mere argument,

that claims billions of lives,

destroys everything you have ever known.

It scars you,

changes you.


It tears you away from the ones you love,

shatters dreams, hopes;

blots away live like a pen on a paper.


The feeling of captivity,

as you long to soar as you once did,

The experience of sitting still in a bunker,

simply hoping and praying that you get to live to see a new day,

The moment when everyone around you falls,

and you know that within seconds you will fall too…


This is what a war makes you feel…

It wrenches your soul out,

manipulates you,

until the only rational thought you have left is to live;

or even die.


A war shapes the future,

shatters the present,

and destroys the past.


-By Lavanya Gupta

Us

You were the rhythm to my heartbeat,

the smile to my tears,

the yes to my every no.

You were the sun,

I was the moon;

we were perfect.


We were hope and trust,

bound together by faith and destiny.

We were opposites,

but that only brought us closer,

held together by an unbreakable bond;

or so we thought…


Words wrecking us apart,

making us more distant by the minute.

We went our own way,

forests of hatred driving us further apart…

We thought we were unbreakable,

but we did break ourselves apart.

Separated by a wall,

built brick by brick;

by those words we can’t take back,

those actions we wish we wish we hadn’t carried out.


As I see you today,

that unpenetrable wall falls down.

I realize what a fool I once was.

You were and you will always be

my everything.

Without you I am one half of a whole

a sky without stars,

a dream without a plan,

and a girl with no heart.


-By Lavanya Gupta

We are more than I, we are US´╗┐

Remember Me

You have no idea,

how much I’ll miss you.

I just saw the sun;

and now the clouds are back again…

will you miss me too?


I’ll miss your smile,

your comforting laugh,

the warmth in your eyes,

the way you were just there-

I guess I took your presence for granted.

There is so much I have to tell you,

dreams and hopes;

Who will I tell them to now?


Will you even remember me?

I’m the shy girl,

the one who always had her nose in her novel,

but whose day brightened up,

when she saw you around the corner…

The one who pretended not to see you,

but failed miserably.

The one who wished, with all her heart,

that you saw her too;

that girl.

Please,

just promise me that you’ll always remember me.


-By Lavanya Gupta

You and I, we may go away, but we’ll stay together, always…